How to Think Your Way to Orgasm with Erotic Hypnosis

Wait, what?

Hypnosis may make you think of swinging pendulums or oscillating swirls. But rippling orgasms?

Well, that’s the whole point of erotic hypnosis — which, yup (!) is a thing.

“Erotic hypnosis entails using hypnosis to enhance sensuality, sexual response, feelings, and sensations without necessarily needing to be touched,” explains Kaz Riley, a kink-friendly clinical hypnotherapist who specializes in working with folks experiencing sexual dysfunction.

According to Riley, it can be used for many things, such as:

• to enhance connection during lovemaking
• as a tool during a BDSM scene
• to intensify orgasms
• to help someone overcome sexual shame, trauma, or dysfunction

“It’s a powerful tool for exploring your sexual and erotic self,” says Jon S., an erotic hypnotist who has practiced for over 20 years.

Is that actually legit?

“It most definitely is,” says Riley.

In case you were wondering: “Yes, anyone could have an orgasm through erotic hypnosis, provided they felt safe enough to do so.”

But, she says, erotic hypnosis — like any kind of sexual activity — is about way more than orgasm. It’s about pleasure, connection, and relaxation.

How does it work?

Like any kind of hypnosis, erotic hypnosis involves guiding someone into an extreme state of relaxation, where your inhibitions are lower.

Jon S. says it’s similar to the state you’re in right before you fall asleep.

“You’re extraordinarily relaxed, your conscious mind is somewhat subdued, and you can have a conversation, but you’re more susceptible or vulnerable than normal.”

PSA: Erotic hypnosis can’t make you do anything you don’t want to do. “Hypnosis doesn’t mean that you have no inhibition, it means you have less inhibitions,” says Riley. “It can make you more susceptible, but it doesn’t take away your morals or ethics.”

What makes erotic hypnosis, well, erotic? It could be any number of things, depending on:

• the context or setting the hypnotism is taking place (for instance, in a BDSM scene)
• the “goal” of the hypnotism (for instance, to orgasm or train someone to orgasm on command)
• who the hypnotist is (for instance, a Dominatrix you hired to hypnotize you, or your partner)

“There are a ton of different ways an erotic hypnosis session could go. It all depends on what the subject wants to get out of it,” says Natasha Strange, a professional Dominatrix who offers erotic hypnosis and proprietrix of Sub Rosa PDX, a boutique fetish space in Portland, Oregon.

Generally speaking, a session will begin with a conversation (or negotiation) about goals, boundaries, and safe words.

Then, the hypnotist will help you get into a relaxed state using something called “the induction of hypnosis.”

“This can be done in a number of different ways, but this is generally done with voice,” says Riley.

Once you’re in that state, any number of things could take place based on what was previously agreed on.

“This could include touch or not,” adds Riley.

How is it different from listening to audio porn or erotic ASMR?

Many, many things.

“ASMR, audio porn, and erotic hypnosis are three completely different entities,” says Riley.

“Erotic hypnosis and AMSR can both help you experience physical sensations via voice and sound.”

During erotic hypnosis, you enter a much deeper state of relaxation (aka a hypnotic state) than you do listening to ASMR.

“Audio porn is an external stimulation that helps people become aroused,” explains Riley. “While erotic hypnosis helps people tap into an internal sensation that allows them to achieve arousal.”

Can you do it online, or is an IRL connection key?

According to Riley, “It can be done in real life, or remotely.”

There are pros and cons to each approach.

While expert-led audio guides on the internet may feel safer — because you can do them right from the comfort of your own home — finding an online hypnotist that you like can be tricky.

As Strange says, “There are a lot of underwhelming tutorials and videos on the internet.”

Finding an actual person to hypnotize you IRL will require a little hunting, too.

A simple Google search will bring up a hundred of folks claiming to be erotic hypnotists. But, “don’t just ‘go out’ with the first person you come across,” says Jon S.

“Treat it like online dating: Ask them questions, see if you vibe with and could trust them,” he says.

“Don’t do anything with an erotic hypnotist who tries to rush you or who seems impatient with the get-to-know-you process.”

Riley adds: “Anybody who doesn’t want to know what your limits or wishes or safe words are isn’t a professional you want to be engaging with.”

You might seek out a clinical hypnotist like Riley. Or, you might hire a Dominatrix like Strange. Or, you might invite someone who you’ve heard good things about via word of mouth to hypnotize you.

How do you get started?

Good news: It’s as easy as deciding that you want to start.

Experiment with regular hypnosis

Before you explore erotic hypnosis, Jon S. says it’s a good idea to make sure you enjoy non-erotic hypnosis.

“Go to YouTube, look up ‘hypnosis videos,’ and then give one a try,” he says.

This is a good opportunity to find out how susceptible you are to hypnosis — aka how easily you enter a trance state.

Find a hypnotist

If it’s to work through sexual shame, trauma, or dysfunction, you’ll probably want to work with a sex-positive clinical hypnotherapist.

If you want to explore the kinky side of erotic hypnosis, you might hire a Dominatrix, peruse FetLife, or ask around your local BDSM community to find a Dom(me) who specializes in hypnosis.

If you want to explore hypnosis with your current sexual partner(s), you might hire a Dominatrix or sex-positive clinical hypnotherapist together.

You may try to find someone online who you both jive with. Or, you might watch online videos together.

If you’re just generally interested in erotic hypnosis, using a pre-recorded audio clip or video can work.

If you find their voice annoying or think they’re a hoax, it’s unlikely that they’ll help you enter a trance state. Riley says reading reviews on the video before watching can be helpful.

Talk with the hypnotist

“Safety and consent are paramount,” says Riley, adding that this is why a conversation is so important.

This conversation should go over:

• any medical conditions that could affect the session
• any sexual trauma you have experienced that could affect the session
• any trigger words you have
• what the objective of the session is
• whether touch is allowed or will be useful

Ask them to program in a safe word

“The hypnotist will need to implement the safe word into the programming,” explains Jon S.

The hypnotist may say something like, “If at any point in this hypnosis there’s any part of your mind that doesn’t like what’s happening, say ‘STOP.’”

This will help you feel safer, and therefore be able to relax more deeply into the hypnosis.

Try it

Know this: It may work — but it may not!

Getting from point A to point erotic-hypnosis-induced-O may take time. How much time varies from person to person.

Reflect

You’ll be able to remember everything that happens while you’re “under.” So, go ahead and spend some time remembering what it was like, how you felt, and what took place.

What if it doesn’t work?

It might not the first time! “Nothing is 100 percent guaranteed,” says Riley.

Not trusting the hypnotist and being skeptical of the process or of hypnosis overall can make being hypnotized trickier. So can simply just being new to hypnotism!

Implement a mindfulness practice

“For most people, it’s not necessary to have a meditation or mindfulness practice ahead of time, but for folks that are having a hard time entering a trance state, it can be helpful,” says Jon S.

You might try:

• using the Headspace mindfulness app
• practicing yoga
• exploring intentional breathing

Try it again

“Hypnosis is a learned process, so you’ll have to commit to the learning,” says Riley.

“It’s not a right here, right now kind of thing. Practice makes perfect.”

What if you want to do it to someone else?

If you want to erotically hypnotize someone else, the most important thing for you to know is that this isn’t something you can just jump into!

“If the hypnotist doesn’t know what they’re doing, it’s not a good idea,” says Jon S.

“If you want to erotically hypnotize someone else, you need to have done your research.”

Next, learn more about erotic hypnosis

Strange learned about erotic hypnosis by hiring another Dominatrix who practices erotic hypnosis and asking them to teach her. You might try that.

You might become a clinical hypnotist with a specialty in sexual health.

Or, you may just consume as many books, videos, and articles about erotic hypnosis as you can.

Try it, but talk to your partner first

“Once you have a partner who’s interested in trying it with you, you should try it,” says Riley.

Here’s what you need to know first:

• What are their boundaries? What are yours?
• Will you be using a safe word?
• What are their triggers?
• What do they want to experience?
• What will the safe word be?

Just remember: It isn’t about you

“It’s not about your needs, wants, and desires, it’s about your subject’s needs, wants, and desires,” says Riley.

Is there anything you can do to enhance the experience?

Let’s say it for the umpteenth time: There’s no limit to what erotic hypnosis can include.

After getting the hang of touch-free erotic hypnosis — and as long as both you and the hypnotist are enthusiastically interested — you might try:

• using sex toys
• having oral sex
• bringing in bondage
• exploring multiple orgasms

Where can you learn more?

Got more Qs? “Mastering Erotic Hypnosis: A Comprehensive Manual for Erotic Play, Fetish, and Kink” by James Gordon and Rebecca Doll and “Mind Play: A Guide To Erotic Hypnosis” by Mark Wiseman are both great resources.

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