Someday, your grandchildren, if you have them, will ask you what it was like to watch Tom Bradyâ€”the greatest quarterback ever, by a rather wide marginâ€”play. That you lived in the time of Brady, who is officially retiring after reports emerged over the weekend, will seem remarkable to them, in the same way it seemed remarkable to me that my grandfather was old enough to grow up watching Babe Ruth. Brady did things in the NFL, like Ruth, that will not seem possible to future generations. The kids will want to know.
If you are being honest, you will tell them the truth, which will be, â€œwell, grandchild, we drew penises on photos of him and posted them to the Internet, flipped him off every time he showed up on our screens and never missed an opportunity to call him a cheating asshole and a fascist.â€ But you wonâ€™t be honest. You will tell them he was the best quarterback you ever saw and everybody loved him. You have, whether you realize it or not, already started doing it.
In many ways, athlete retirements are like celebrity deaths: most of the hard edges are sanded off until only the parts we liked remain. We want to think about the good stuff. And it generally stays that way. After all: Weâ€™ve already buried the dead. Alex Rodriguez was the most despised player in baseball for essentially the last 15 years of his career; within three years of retiring, he was the lead broadcaster on ESPNâ€™s signature â€œSunday Night Baseballâ€ broadcast and going to the Oscars with J-Lo. Charles Barkley was one of the NBAâ€™s great villainsâ€”a charismatic, electric one, but a villain neverthelessâ€”before becoming one of the leagueâ€™s signature personalities in retirement. (Allen Iverson is revered now, justifiably, but forever under attack when he was active.) Kobe Bryant, Dan Marino, John McEnroe, Randy Moss â€¦ they were all often considered Public Enemy No. 1 when they were still playing, but once they hung â€˜em up, we remembered the joy they gave us, not the rage.
Brady might have taken more shit than any of them. Though the MAGA hat in his locker probably made him look like more of a Trump loyalist than he really wasâ€” he never did attend any of the Patriotsâ€™ celebrations at the Trump White House, though Robert Kraft, the team owner who put the hat in his locker, never missed oneâ€”that was just one of many Brady controversies. Deflategate was the biggest one, but there was also Spygate and the Tuck Rule and the weird mouth kisses with his son and his super shady personal trainer and his questionable vitamin â€œsupplements.â€. By the end of his career, even after heâ€™d won his seventh Super Bowl, most sports fansâ€”just about everybody not from Tampa or New Englandâ€” were jeering just at the mention of his name. Aaron Rodgers thought there was schadenfreude after his loss last week? Brady has been going through that for more than 20 years.
Adding to all of this was the fact that Brady was impossible. After 22 seasons, at the age of 44, he still threw for the most yards (5,316) in the NFL this year, the highest total of his career, and also had the most completions and most touchdowns; had he returned next year, the Buccaneers would have been one of the favorites to win the 2023 Super Bowl. (Now they wonâ€™t even be expected to make the playoffs.) No one else from Bradyâ€™s draft class was still playing his year; in the NFC, he was in fact older than all the coaches. The game of football has shifted away from the famously immobile Bradyâ€™s style of play, and yet he was still dominating it to the very end. He once said he wanted to play until he was 50â€”something no one, not even a kicker, has ever doneâ€”and few doubted that he could. He was infuriating in many ways to so many people, but he was also the best. Only one other player, the linebacker Bill Haley, has as many as five Super Bowl rings, and no quarterback has more than four.